A lifeguard is probably the most underrated job anyone can have. As commas are to sentences, lifeguards are to Schlitterbahn–they save people’s lives! That being said, Schlitterbahn only wants the best people working at the park , so we made a list of our ideal candidates! You know, people that are smart, brave, and tan. Oh, and people who can swim? For the sake of this blog, let’s not make that a requirement. I mean, everyone can doggy paddle, right?! Without further ado, I present to you Schlitterbahn’s dream team!
Beyonce: Schlitterbahn would like to personally let Beyonce know that we are hiring lifeguards, and that she is our ideal candidate! Why? Well, first off, she is a survivor! Approximately 13 years ago she was deserted on an island and saved two girls named Kelly and Michelle, all while looking fierce! If that doesn’t scream ideal lifeguard then we don’t know what does! Oh, and she loves the color blue–which is the color of the water that flows through Schlitterbahn… The ball is in your court, Beyonce!
Leonardo Dicaprio: Leonardo has been in many movies that have involved water, so we are sure he will feel right at home at Schlitterbahn! Though in Titanic he died in a large body of water, he died out of bravery, letting Rose lay on the wooden door. Leo, (can we call you Leo?) you’re hired!
Michael Phelps: Michael has won 22 medals for swimming…so he has definitely mastered the doggy paddle! If he can’t save you while swimming, well, that would be quite ironic, huh? Michael, come lifeguard at Schlitterbahn! We offer free parking!!! Convinced?!
Kristen Bell: Kristen played a lifeguard in the movie…, wait for it,… The Lifeguard. So, we are positive she will be perfect for the job! Plus, wouldn’t it be great if she sang, “Do you wanna build a snowman?” on repeat while lifeguarding The Congo River?! Schlitterbahn obviously loves the movie Frozen…sorry, we’ll let it go, let it go.
David Hasselhoff: He has perfected his slow motion run, which is the main Schlitterbahn lifeguard requirement. Obviously!
Have you mastered your slow motion run and doggy paddle? Well, what are you waiting for?! Join the real dream team!
(All kidding aside, we do offer the best lifeguard training in the industry, throw amazing parties all season, and have the best perk in the business – free visits to the World’s Best Waterpark!)
Apply to be a lifeguard at Schlitterbahn today! http://bit.ly/11DVHhq